My Herpes Story of Hope

by Guy From Maine
(Maine, USA)

To begin with I'll point out that I don't believe that I'm infected. The last test was negative. For both HSV 1 & 2.


My girlfriend has HSV II. Thus, making this our story. We met using a "dating" kind of website. I had been separated, although not divorced and simply trying to speak to somebody. She had been recently divorced and only planning to find somebody to speak with as well as pass some time. We started talking. She didn't let me know. We talked frequent for approximately four months. Then she dropped the news. Side bar. This was crucial for me personally. When she explained, she didn't attempt to cause it to sound "not so bad". She didn't attempt to tell me that she wished it would not change things. She didn't really want me to have a pity party for her. Just what she did was let me communicate my thoughts. Regardless of whether logical or illogical, these were my own thoughts. At that time, herpes hasn't been about her, it was about me. She was there to support me. She was there to listen to what might have been my frustration for not informing me sooner, or my aggravation that I liked somebody with herpes, or whatever my thoughts had been. She was there to guide me and provide me a chance to run in the event that is what I wanted to do. After that she made another wonderful choice. She explained she understood that I would want a bit of time to process. She explained that no matter what my feelings were, I had the right to feel that way. But most notably, she told me to do the homework and find out what I thought. If she would have attempted to supply me statistics or said it was not as undesirable as many people believe... I'd have considered that to be desperate.

Back to my story. Initially I had serious worries about perusing something physical. I in fact informed her I did not believe we could be anything more than good friends. She accepted that. We continued to communicate. My feelings for her continued to be powerful. I did research, then more research, then even more research. At some point I came to understand that this thing is simply an inconvenience. Of course it sucks, however things in life occur and you simply need to move ahead. If you tell a man or woman and they cannot get past it, then you're far better off without them. Should they accept you, it's really a incredible declaration of their commitment to you.

Presently, this girl and I have dated for four months. We've been sexual on numerous occasions. I still get worried every once in awhile, however in general I've accepted this fact. At some point, unless something unforeseen occurs, I'll get married to her. Perhaps I'll contract prior to we marry, maybe after, maybe never. It does not alter how I feel about her. Perhaps I'm naive. I guess that I might contract and encounter so much pain that I'll feel disappointed about ever meeting her. Even so, this appears to be extremely unlikely. It appears a lot more likely that ultimately I will contract. I'll then begin Valtrex. I'll stay loyal to her and she to me. We'll grow old and possess a lifetime of joy and happiness.

This really is going to sound ridiculous, however I have in fact flipped this into a positive thing. I've been divorced 2 times. I really could pretend that neither of them had been my fault but the truth is that I am confident I played a role in the downfall of each. Understanding that I really could by now be infected reminds me that I have to work every single day on being the very best boyfriend and ultimately husband that I can be. This relationship has to work. I will not allow it to needlessly fail. She is remarkable and definitely will make me an awesome wife.

I only say all this to inspire everyone. You will find men and women out there much like me. You do not hear from all of them on this site but they're here. Have encouragement from our story and understand that you will discover joy and happiness. It just might take a little more time and perseverance than you would really like.

Make sure you do not respond and place me on some pedestal. I'm only a man that is indirectly impacted by this and wants to provide some hope to the ones that are having difficulties.

I'm going to be praying for you despite the fact that I do not know your name.


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May 01, 2011
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thank u
by: Anonymous

Thank u for your story. I am a twice divorced female that has finally found someone that I adore. We have been on a whirlwind for the past 4 months and suddenly i out of the clear blue sky I need to see the doctor asap! He is HSV2 negative and I feel that I will have to walk away from him if I am positive. I have been crying all weekend but reading ur story keeps me hopeful. Take care!

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