Herpes IS a big deal

by Cynthia
(Iowa)

I was diagnosed in April of 2016. It was one of the most traumatic experiences in my life. I had been dating a man that was in his 40s since May of 2015 who specifically told me he did NOT have hsv2.


Since I was diagnosed I have gone maybe 1 week without an outbreak. Today is July 17, 2017. It has destroyed my confidence, I had to quit my dream job, and I lost friends and family along the way because I was in a terrible dark place.

It isn't just a minor skin condition. I live with the tingling and itching almost every day. The medications are garbage. They make you sick. Sometimes I don't know if it's the herpes or the medication side effects. I will spend days in bed with a headache, muscle aches, and fatigue.

A week after I was diagnosed I had a seizure which was suspected to be from viral meningitis. I went from being a normal 26 year old woman that ate healthy, worked out everyday, and was ready to take on the world to ... someone I don't even know.

The man that gave it to me turned into a nightmare and tried to deny it while going back to his ex girlfriend while waging psychological warfare against me. He is a narcissist. About 2 months later I found out he had been cheating on me with another younger woman and never told her either but did admit to it after I told her. All drama.

But the reality is it changed my life - physically, emotionally, and mentally. I'm dealing with this virus on a daily basis and constantly thinking about it.

The worst part is he knew he was having an outbreak. I remember the night it happened. He said he had a "love sore from having sex too vigorously with me" (ya right) and then 2 days later I had my first HUGE sore. While I was freaking out before my doctors appt he told me it was "probably a pepper burn from the peppers he ate that night" (again .... ya right).

Maybe the experience wouldn't have been so bad if he was just honest with me and didn't continue to do this to other young women of child bearing age. We are now moving forward with a settlement agreement. This virus is awful especially for women.

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Jul 19, 2017
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Herpes is a Big Deal...If you let it be a Big Deal
by: Ed

First of all I want to thank you for having the courage to tell us your story. Your struggles are shared by many and simply knowing that you're not alone is healing in itself.

Secondly, a part of the problems that you are having with HSV2 is your inability to move past the diagnosis. You have to move past the fact that some dude lied to you and infected you with this disease. Crying about it and suing the guy isn't going to change your diagnosis. You're going to have to deal with it sooner or later.

Trust me, it's not going to make you feel better knowing that you just nailed his ass to the wall...well..maybe for a little while :) but in the end you will still have HSV-2 and you're still going to have to deal with it in a positive way. Or else you're going to stay lost in your own negative thoughts.

You have to stop letting the diagnosis define you. Millions of people have this disease...me included. A lot of us were infected in the same manner as you...again myself included. But you have to put all of that aside and rediscover all of the wonderful things that make you special.

I know this reply seems harsh and blunt but sometimes life is like that. If I can turn this negative into a positive then you can too. It's as simple as changing the way that you look at the diagnosis and how you look at yourself.

Ed

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