Genital Herpes - My Life Was Just Beginning
by Erin Jade
It all happened when I was 15 years old. I had dropped out of high school and was about to have my 1st child. I was not that stressed out from it because I had my mom’s support and she didn’t kick me out like most parents would.
While pregnant with my first child I had caught Chlamydia. At the time I didn’t know much about STD's because I had never had one. When the doctor told me I had it I was like what is this?
That’s when he told me you that you catch it from having sex. I was scared at first because I didn’t know if I could get rid of it and would it do something to my baby. But everything turned out to be OK. By then it was almost time for me to have him.
On October 23rd, I gave birth to a baby boy and I felt full of love and had plans to become a great mother but by me being so young and not having much money to take care of him, I had to give him up for a while until i was able to take care of him on my own.
At this point in my life I was stressed out and felt useless because the only thing that made me whole was gone. So I fell into a life of partying and seeing a lot of guys that was way too old for me. It kind of made me forget about my problems but soon my life would change forever.
I was hanging out one night when I met this guy from New Orleans. We became friends right away and started partying and hanging out together. I really did see him as a friend and I didn’t want a sexual relationship with him. So I told him I would always be there if he needed me.
One night he calls me up drunk and told me that him and his girlfriend had just got into it and he needed somebody to talk to. I agreed and waited for him to show up. When he got there he asked me to take a ride with him, me thinking nothing of it said OK and hopped in the truck with him. He stopped and parked at a empty parking lot me sitting there I asked him what’s the deal? He just looked at me and told me he thought I was very cute and that he wanted to have sex with me. I had said no even though he was a very nice looking guy!
I told him he was just mad at his girlfriend and he needed to go home to her. But his mind was stuck on being with me. I grew scared because I knew he had a gun in his truck and I was afraid of what he might do
since we was alone. So I went along with having have sex with him that night. I didn’t enjoy it because the thought of him having a girlfriend made me feel bad and kind of like a slut. When he dropped me off that night I didn’t want to speak to anymore and I had started not to take his calls anymore.
I had moved on with my life and started to forget about that night. I had started seeing this new guy that I was head over hills for and I had felling for him. We started out as friends and our feelings had grown for each other. When he had made me his girlfriend I felt like the luckiest girl in the word. All I could think about was us spending our lives together…keep in mind I’m still 15 at the time and was almost at 16.
Soon after we had got together we had moved in together. I was ready to spend my life with him. Not long after we moved in together he had cheated on me. I felt hurt and everything but loved. I wanted to leave him but I loved him too much and I wanted to make it work. So I took him back.
By then he had wanted us to get tested. At first, I didn’t want too because I was scared. But I went on to get tested. When the doctor called me to the back I had this funny feeling and was even more scared. When he told me I had herpes I felt my heart drop to the floor and all I could think about was how was I going to tell my boyfriend and how was he going to take it.
Soon as I came form the back I told him I have something to tell you and he said OK. What is it and I said I have herpes the second thing I asked was are you going to leave me and he said no. I was scared and at the same time happy that he was going to stand by my side and be there for me.
I have been living with herpes for five years now and it has not changed my life at all. I am now 19 and pregnant with my second son and I’m still with the same guy. I have my first son back he is now four. I didn’t mean to write so much but this is my first time telling my story and it feels good.
So to anybody that has herpes don’t give up and your life is not over. THANK YOU FOR READING MY STORY!Thank you so much for sharing your story with our community. I'm sure it will serve as an inspiration for many young people struggling with the virus.
Have a great New Year.
Wishing you success and happiness!